WEST COVINA, CA — Long-time ward music director and self-proclaimed “Latter-Day Saint Vincent,” Sister Kendra Bradshaw (née Christensen), 39, is reportedly in emotional free fall after Sister Olivia Li — a Juilliard-trained pianist and composer — moved into the West Covina Ward and played a postlude that caused audible gasps and at least one confirmed speaking-in-tongues incident.
Bradshaw, who earned her Bachelor’s in Vocal Performance from BYU in 2012 and has since served as ward choir director, primary pianist, and impromptu sacrament meeting soloist “when the Spirit moves,” described the incident as “a spiritual ambush.”
“She came in with that humble-yet-cosmopolitan vibe, like she wasn’t about to sight-read ‘Come, Come Ye Saints’ in the key of F# minor with chromatic reharmonization,” Bradshaw said, blinking back tears while clutching her well-worn Hymns Made Fancy binder. “And then—THEN—she adds dorian modulation. In the closing hymn. Who does that? This is a house of God, not a jazz club.”
Witnesses say the trouble began when Li, 29, was asked to play prelude music for sacrament meeting after the regular organist called in sick due to an “Iron rod deficiency”. What began as a polite rendition of “Be Still, My Soul” soon morphed into a gently cascading Debussy-inspired improvisation that one deacon described as “what I assume angels hear when they put on noise-canceling headphones.”
The bishop, clearly entranced, was overheard whispering, “We have found The One,” while wiping away tears and canceling the ward choir’s scheduled “Joseph Smith the Prophet” medley.
Within a week, Li had been called as Ward Music Chair, Pianist, and “Liturgical Enrichment Chair” — a calling that appears to have been invented specifically for her. Bradshaw, previously known for ending rehearsals with spiritual thoughts involving personal metaphors about being a ‘conductor in the Lord’s orchestra,’ was reassigned to be the Assistant Bulletin Folder, effective immediately.
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“She’s probably just here for grad school at USC, right?” Bradshaw was heard saying to no one in particular in the Relief Society room. “She’ll be gone in a year. Two, tops. I’ll be back. They always come back to Kendra.”
Bradshaw has since begun attending another ward’s sacrament meeting “just to see what their musical situation is like,” and has started an anonymous Instagram account, @HymnPurist1776, which has posted several confusing memes about “musical apostasy” and “The Great and Spacious Jazz Hands.”
Meanwhile, Sister Li has reportedly declined further accolades. “I just wanted to serve,” she said modestly, while casually arranging a string quartet version of “Abide With Me” that made the entire stake presidency abide in loud clapping mid-meeting.
